Here are some tips to make it easier. Depending on your dating goals, building up a long-term permanent relationship might be your top priority. The initial process of seduction, no matter who drives it, is all about intrigue and discovering the unknown.
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You want to preserve as much of that feeling as possible so that you can deploy it over and over again throughout your relationship. This means holding back a few surprises to delight your man when he least expects them. Where one man will be delighted to discover you want him to take you skinny dipping, another may be turned off. This point digs a bit into cultural biases, but you should be prepared to work with what you have.
The truth of the matter is that guys are allowed to be way more picky about public displays of affection than women are. Some guys are happy and proud to smooch their girlfriends on the library steps; others feel uncomfortably exposed even holding hands at the bus stop.
Keep Criticism To A Minimum. Of all the things men look for in relationships, constructive criticism is always near the bottom of the list. Do your best to refrain from being intentionally or even accidentally critical. You need to stay aware of the fact that far from their cliche reputation for being unfeeling and uncaring, men are actually just as capable as women are of twisting words and using them to reinforce their fears.
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Clear appreciation can be an enormous motivator, especially as a relationship matures and heads for the long term. One of the best parts of being in a relationship is to be able to have fun with your man and be naughty from time to time. Guys love it when a girl gets sexual with them and suggests naughty things that they would like to do with their fella.
Of course, how and when you do this all depends on what stage you are at in your relationship and the level of comfort and safety you feel with your guy and only let the relationship develop to this stage when you are ready and you feel that your man is someone with whom you feel safe with and you can trust in order to become more intimate. With that said, one great way to spice up your relationship is with a few naughty texts at the right times. Guys love getting naughty texts from their lady and ads an element of excitement and passion to the relationship.
To learn all about sexting, see our article on How to talk dirty to your man with text messages. As you settle into a relationship, all kinds of distractions start to crowd in. If you eventually have kids together, that becomes even more true.
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Try to set the mood ahead of time to really enhance the moment. Schedule a romantic date night, send him sexy texts during the day, or set your alarm a little earlier so you have time for a morning quickie. Don't ever let anyone pressure you into having sex if you don't want to.
Sex is only fun if both parties are fully into it. If you don't want to have sex, whether it's the first time or you're in a long-term relationship, say no and stick to it. No one should ever pressure you into sex. Don't start an argument every time he leaves his socks on the floor. Focus on what you like about him, rather than the things he does that annoy you. If he sees that you don't start arguments over petty issues, he'll be more likely to listen when you have a problem you want to talk about.
Try to resolve issues calmly. Try to have a conversation rather than an argument. If a tense issue comes up that you need to talk about, try to have a mature discussion where you both are able to explain how you feel. Pick a time when you're both free of other distractions so you can focus on each other. Start the conversation with a positive statement about your partner, then follow with what's bothering you.
Try saying, "I love that you're so excited about your new phone, but I feel a little frustrated that you didn't think you should talk to me before buying something that cost so much. Say things like "I respect your independence; I just want to feel included in big decisions" or "You're usually very considerate so this surprised me. Take a break if things get out of hand. If you can feel your emotions getting the best of you, take a minute break, then come back and finish your discussion. Go for a walk or take a drive in your car, then come back and talk about it. Don't stockpile your problems.
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Hanging on to hurt feelings can build up, and then when you argue you let it all out. Instead of dealing with one issue, you're arguing about several different things, and there's no way to actually fix them. Talk about problems as they come up. If there are a lot of unresolved issues in your relationship, you might need to evaluate whether you're with the right person.
Everyone argues once in awhile, but do your best to let it go as quickly as possible. Avoid hurt feelings and possibly damaging your relationship for good by allowing the argument to die down quickly. To have a healthy relationship, sometimes you have to be willing to "lose" an argument.
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Once you've expressed your thoughts, let the conversation go. If you stay calm, he's more likely to think about what you had to say.
Repair the relationship as soon as possible. Use humor or say something caring to break the mood. Try to find something you can do together to get back on the same page, like watching a movie. You can ask him if he would mind showing you more physical and emotional affection, but if a guy isn't affectionate by nature, this isn't likely to change.
Not Helpful 1 Helpful Everyone expresses their feelings in their own way. If he's not super talkative about his feelings, get to know him and find out what his love language is. He might express love through giving gifts, doing nice things for you, spending quality time with you, or through physical touch.
Not Helpful 5 Helpful If a man is interested, he will usually make time to spend with you. He might call or text you when he has free time, stop by your work just to talk to you on your break, or ask you if he can take you on a date. Im in highschool and I was wondering how to get a guy interested in you if you have one class together. Try to get a seat close to him in that class.
Smile at him whenever the two of you make eye contact. You can also try waiting for him after class and talking to him about your assignments or something funny someone said to the teacher. Not Helpful 6 Helpful If he's a good guy who treats you well, give him space to hang out with his friends.